


Have Gun Will Travel

by romanticalgirl



Series: Bullet in the Barrel (of Your Best Guy's Gun) [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Assassin Bucky Barnes, Discussion of assassination, Gen, Non-Serum Steve Rogers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-05-22
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:46:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24323002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/romanticalgirl/pseuds/romanticalgirl
Summary: Apparently Steve is now an assassin's Devil's advocate.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers
Series: Bullet in the Barrel (of Your Best Guy's Gun) [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1584283
Comments: 22
Kudos: 119





	Have Gun Will Travel

"Okay, so I know you're anti-murder."

Steve groans. "You're going to make me an accessory again, aren't you?"

"We could just be having a normal conversation where I'm trying to get your stance on important topics."

"But that's not why you're calling."

"No."

"It's the accessory thing, isn't it?"

"Only if I give you details. Anyway. He's a politician."

"These are details!" Steve reminds him, voice a little higher than normal with panic. "I don't want details. I don't want to be your conscience!"

"You're my sounding board. I have a conscience."

"I'm a wrong phone number!" Bucky's silent for a long time, and Steve has a hard time swallowing. "Bucky?"

There still isn't a response until suddenly there's a dial tone. 

"Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit." Steve shakes his head. "Nope. Nope. This is a good thing. Not knowing about murder is a good thing. Assassins are bad guys, no matter how hot they are or whether or not they kill bad people, because they kill good people too. JFK was a… mostly good person. King! Martin Luther King, Junior was a good person. Assassins are bad."

He starts nodding and then groans, banging his head on his kitchen counter. He's not going to call. He is absolutely not going to call. He is smarter and stronger and, no matter what Sam says to piss him off, he's not really an asshole. So murder. Bad. 

"Fuck."

He calls back, assuring himself that having Bucky's number in his phone as 'America's Most Wanted' is simply an assurance he won't _accidentally_ call the number. It kicks to voicemail, and Steve didn't think anyone could sound good in voicemail, but somehow Bucky manages it.

"Okay, so I know you're mad at me, and hopefully that doesn't mean you're going to kill me, but you could call me back. If you wanted. And we could talk. In vague terms. The kinds that don't make me an accessory, and that is such a weird word, because it sounds like you're going to put me on to adorn your outfit, and, oh god, you probably don't use words like adorn, because I cannot physically stop talking. Jesus. Uh. Call me. If you want. No pressure. Also please don't kill me. I know you said you would only kill me if someone paid you, but you also said you do pro bono work and oh god, hanging up now."

He pushes the end button on his phone before he can say anything else. He goes to the refrigerator and pulls out a beer and opens it. He takes a few swallows and sighs, dropping the bottle when he starts as he phone rings.

'America's Most Wanted' shows up on the phone, and Steve nearly sends it to voicemail in his haste. "Yeah. Hi. Hey."

"If I promise not to kill you, will you stop being worried that I will kill you?"

"What if someone paid you to kill me?"

"Is that likely?"

He pauses for a long moment. "Probably not?"

Bucky is quiet then he laughs softly. "Okay, I can understand that answer."

"Hey!"

"So, we can discuss adornment?"

"No!" Steve feels himself blushing. "No adornment! Just, like, window shopping."

"You are probably the strangest person I've ever met."

"Well. Okay. Fair. But you're the deadliest. And I'd totally win the 'my friend's got the weirdest job' contests. If they had those, which they don't. You didn't kill Martin Luther King, Junior, did you?"

"No. But I had, I wouldn't have gotten caught. Also, I'm twenty-eight."

"That's fair. I mean, I didn't think you looked old enough or anything. I just. You know, wanted to be sure." He clears his throat and realizes there's beer and broken glass all over the floor and he should probably do something about that. "I'm alone, so I'm going to put you on speaker while I do some stuff."

"You want to talk about this on speaker." It's not a question, but Steve realizes exactly how inappropriate it might be. 

"Right. I can clean up later."

"So he's a politician. Crooked. Dirty. I know that's most likely redundant, since I said he was a politician."

"I mean, not necessarily, but I'll concede the point."

"He introduced and steamrollered a bill that has resulted in the deaths of over a hundred people."

"Is he the President?"

"No. I'd do that pro bono if someone asked."

Steve absolutely does not consider it before shaking his head and getting back to the point of the conversation. "Okay, well, two questions."

"That won't make you an accessory?"

He can hear Bucky's smile in his voice and he scowls at his phone. "Will killing this guy get the legislation changed? And-or will killing him make him any kind of martyr?"

"Hmm."

Steve stares at the phone when he realizes Bucky disconnected the call. Steve's apartment smells like beer and his head hurts. He glances at the mess on the floor and shakes his head, heading to bed to take a nap.

**

"I didn't take the job."

Steve starts as Bucky slides into the chair across from his. "Do I want to know how you found me?"

"People are creatures of habit." He shrugs. "Who is the man you were with?"

"The man? Oh. That's Sam."

"Hmm."

"Okay. Now that 'hmm' makes me nervous." Steve keeps his eyes on Bucky. "Sam's my best friend. Good guy. Not murderable."

"Everyone is murderable."

Steve whimpers softly. How did this become his life? "Okay, technically, yes. But you're not allowed to. I would most definitely disapprove of that. And he's not a bad guy. He's the best guy I know."

"Boyfriend?"

Steve chokes on his sip of coffee. "What?"

"Though you were with Angie-baby." Bucky's head tilts. "You prefer girls."

"No, I… I don't _prefer_ either one. And why is this a topic of conversation?"

Bucky shrugs one shoulder. "You were right. Killing him wouldn't have changed anything."

"Oh. So that's… good? I mean, that's good, right?"

"Good. Bad." Bucky shrugs again. "Either way, it's not ten-thousand."

Steve chokes again, no help from the coffee this time. "Dollars?"

Bucky blinks serenely. "Well, not pennies."

"Right. Dollars. Yeah." He breathes out roughly. "Right. So. I'll get coffee. What do you like?"


End file.
